laughing to keep from crying

wow so yea i found out some disturbing news about a guy im talking to..i don't know why i am surprised this always happens ..i mean ALWAYS..this is why i keep m guard up and don't talk to to dudes because in the end im the one always getting hurt..man FUCK THAT! & FUCK YOU! i was nothing but nice to you. i never hassled you about anything. i even gave you the benefit of the doubt so many times so i guess you can it is my fault for being so stupid and giving them to you..i thought it was all on the girl..thinking o well maybe that girl just likes him and is crazy. but nope it's you ..you fucked up BIG time. i never asked you for anything..all i asked for you to be was real with me and you told me i did not have to worry about that. i should have known better. WOW im like still in shock..i wish you could feel the way i feel right now. Do you know what it feels like to have your heart ripped from you and stumped on with out any remorse. i feel like somebody just hit me with a recking ball in the stomach. This is a feeling i would never wish on my worst enemy because NO ONE deserves to feel this way.

I WAS NOTHIN..NOTHING BUT FUCKIN NICE TO YOU!! & this is how you fucking repay with some bullshit like this. you have no fuckin soul or heart. why couldn't you just be real with me. i honestly thought you were different but i should have listened to my older sister who said "it's the ones you least expect that do you the worse" thanks for proving my sister right.
TRUST ME i will get to the bottom of this and when i do..YOU BETTER PRAY..you BETTER PRAY..that's all i got to say.
FAKE PEOPLE have no place in my life... so get the fuck out..i don't have time.
people would always be like o ariana this guy is cute talk to them but i would say no ..no i can't cause of so and so..ppssh what a fool i was..people would tell me if he doesn't work out there are more fish in the sea and i would tell people but i don't want anyone else..i wanted YOU ... that's why i wish all this was a big lie or that when i get to the bottom of all this bullshit it's not what i expected even though i know it won't work that way..because in some weird way i still want you..but sometimes what we want isn't what we need....

2 fingahs & <3

Crazy Crazy Crazy...

This is how I feel right now..like seriously I feel like my brain is on overload with just random things..thoughts about cartoons, thoughts about food, thoughts of him, thoughts of what the hell im going to wear tomorrow..ugh. I want my brain just to take a break and breathe but NOPE not gonna happen so I guess my crazy thoughts and hormonal frenzy will continue til tomorrow..men are lucky that their "mother" doesn't come to visit them every month!
Hahahahaha sissy I said "mother" just like you hehehe im stilling your word.

2 fingahs & <3

its about that time...

Aaahhhh .My moodiness is about to come..
Omg. Im so friggin irritated right now! I just honestly wanna choke the hell out of someone then just cry and then just lay down and fall asleep.

Yeap im moody!.
Ugh. I hate this....

don't you think...

I get irritated when you ask me the same question everyday. Like you know I haven't talked to "that" person like all day.so why ask it everyday!..
Don't you think I wish I would have talked to "that" person today & that I miss them...
That I want to see him.but can't..
That I get insecure sometimes knowing he goes to a different school & I can't see what he's doing w/ who knows
Don't you think..
That I feel LAME sometimes for even thinkin like that..
I fall for people fast and hard even though I try my hardest NOT too
Don't you think...
That sometimes always trying to see the good in everyone bites me in BUTT!
I feel foolish because I still like him although some of my friends think I shouldn't
I wish he didn't have control over my mood sometimes..
I wish all these thoughts wouldn't go through my head all the time when im asked that question..
so have you talked to "__________" today?
But I simply reply..No..

2 fingahs & <3

I Dream...

delightfuly confused..

Have you ever been delightfuly confused?...like you don't know what's going on but you're enjoying it...like other people may think it's weid but you just find it intriguing..hhmm idk tho.

Ugh. Tho my internet still doesn't work. Ggrrrr. O well I still have my kicker! Lol

& it's almost my KiMMie Poo BirThdaY! Yayyy! I love my Minnesota Boo BOo! Like seriously she's officially one of my sisters!
MiNnEsoTa U BEEZIES!! =]

things never change...

I've decided things never change. once you get happiness it seems like it's get snatched away. Im to throuhg with this crap. This is why i dont get my hopes up for anything anymore. I used to be a person who always looked at the glass half full now im starting to reconsider. I truly wonder how people can go to sleep knowing they hurt someone & made them cry..i mean like really cry. but i refuse to let them get the best of me. I WILL NOT jeopardize my self and happiness because in the end all you have is yourself..right?..

MY PRESIDENT IS BLACK

As on my way to Jack London w/ the homies! HNU is rollin mad deep yo..NO LIE. 3 Cars FuLl! K. But enough bout HNU reppin OBAMA to the fullest..NOT! We had a little ceremony remembering Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. & PRESIDENT Barack Obama Inauguration..President Barack H. Obama..doesn't that just have a nice ring to it! I am for once in my life proud to be an American. But I will write more on this GREAT & HISTORIC DAY later we're @ Jack London Square Block Party.

Sidenote: My President is Black remix w/ Jay-z is ridiculous!..altho he didn't come up with that quote in the song he made it sound DOPE. I LOVE tHat quote.
We actually said that quote in our ceremony today. =]
The Obama's are just waay to AMAZING.
DEUCES more later to come *smooches*
2 fingahs & <3

Krabby Pants

how i was feeling last night for some odd reason i dont even know why. hhmmpphh.
so i just removed myself everyone & knocc'd till my class this morning. yea LAME right! i have a class on saturday from 9 a.m-12 p.m but its cool cuz its African American Studies class. But my question is why do they only offer this class @ this time & if you didnt ask you probably wouldnt even know they offered this class here. Whatev tho this is another entire post by itself. In a better mood this morning. I'm claiming that I'm going to have a BOMB weekend. =]

2 fingahs & <3
THIS lonely loner frees her mind @ night

I think I might run for Mayor on Sundae

I know im SUUPER late posting this but oh well..*cartman's voice* respect my AUTHORITY! =]
The Basement Block Stars in one word: AMAZING
One of the BEST concerts I've attended & for only $10 bux!
My sissy Beth & I were in front & center..literally we were dead in the center of the crowd. lol.
You know how you go to some concerts and the beginning acts are wack but not this one. EVERYONE i mean EVERYONE was beyond DOPE!
I got to sing my song watermelon Sundae into the mic with Dom Kennedy! & got a shotout & 2 free CD's. Dom Kennedy is SIIICCKK!
PAC DIV man no needs for an explination..they were just BOMB especially Young B! hahaha sissy he was on it like it woah! lmao shake that shake that. lmao.
& DJ Hollywood Holt is a fool lol..he's FRESH to the SOCKS in my book!..
here's a snippet of the dopeness..try takin a sniff. lol O & Bee T Dub me and my sissy are in the video...let's play where's ARI & Beth & see if u can spot us?

if you spotted us..give me your address & i will surely give you a cookie on tuesday w/ milk!! hehehe k. lemme get off this thing..signing off. BEAM ME UP SCOTTY! \m/
2 fingahs & <3

p.s i am shaking with anger right now ...FUCK THE SPURS & THEIR BULLSHIT! i DIDNT see ARIZA travel!!

things that make me laugh, cry/smile & scared..

Can I have Yo NUMBER?

I want this song played @ my wedding..but's it's not my official wedding song. that song is Luther Vandros "here and now" but this can be played when i dance with my husband for the 1st time but enuff with all the corny stuff. OMG im tearing up right now. hahahaha

this is one of my favorite hip hop songs of all time..it's a classic but the video still kinda creeps me out. when i was younger i was terrified lol

Dont forget the top coat!

Aaahhh the joys of nail polish. Most people dont think nail polish is important especially guys probably lol. But I think nail polish lets me express myself when i dont want to use words. Usually i choose vibrant bright colors because that's just me. If you know me you know I love bright things so when I have on dark shades people know somthing is wrong NOT all the time though.Sometimes I just like to wear black nail polish although that's so overated right now. Everywhere I go everyone has on black nail polish. UGH. there are other colors than black people..geesh. But whatever to each their own. In the END i have new found love for nail polish. So i am going to admire my nails & toes while watching the LAkers & Spurs game..only during commericial breaks of course!




GO LAKERS!!!! SPURS CAN SUCK IT!! :]

These are a few of my FaVORITE things

i"ve decided I'm going to post a few of my favorite things every week. I thought i would make it a little easier for people to decide what they could possibly get me for my birthday lol jk. but yea i just wanted to share some of things that put a smile on this face like this * cheesing incredibly hard* u know like when you were in kindy without any teeth lol.

Shoes, Shorties, Subways & Scavengers finito

leaving off from my post...
New York was just BOMB..it was GGGGRRREAT as Tony the Tiger would say hahaha. but in all honesty i had a blast there for new years with 2 of my partners in crime. Yes it was freezing beyond belief..& for the people who are used to living in weather lower than 16 degrees i applaud you because i couldnt do it. lol. Im used to wearing flip flops during Christmas time not herman the monster snow boots!
i finally uploaded my pics. it made like 5 albums alone on facebook.
It was an experience of a lifetime because yes i will probably be back in New York for NYE's but not outside freezing to death in times square.






sidenote: the clubs in NY be POPPIN! they dont close till 6!


2 fingahs & <3

Gucci Mane is a BEEZIE

Besides looking like a critter from deep sea lagoon Gucci Mane is also one of thee WORST rappers & a poor excuse of a man. The only reason i can tolerate him is because of the beats, like his song "Go Head". In the song he says:ima spend a couple grand on her ima pop a ruberband on her", this is so ironic because he is now in trouble because he really did put his hands on "her", being rapper Mac Breezy.

& as you can see this is oLd but still you do not hit women! but Im confused because appearently she's still signed to his lable..WTF yo! I be damned if dude would EVER..EVA EVA EVA EVA EVA put his hands on me especially punch me & still be walking around. No im not saying i would kill him but damn near.

Retraction..

so yes it has been brought to my attention by one of my good friends/goober Kiy, that I misquoted Plies. Me not being a huge fan of Plies, I made her prove it to me. & yes *pouty face* she was right. Although Plies will probably never read this, I would juat like to apologize for calling him the most ignorant leprechaun of 09, you're just a leprechaun. & yes i admit i just saw the caption in the magazine while browsing through the article & thats the first thing that caught my attention. I probably should have read the ENTIRE article but I didnt so my fault for delivering false news. hehehe. :)
here is what Plies actually said:
I want to be everything a street n*gga ain’t supposed to be. A street n*gga ain’t supposed to be professional. A street n*gga ain’t supposed to be humble, they supposed to sh*t on everybody. A true street n*gga, he ain’t supposed to be a responsible father - the streets is all he’s supposed to be focused on. A street n*gga isn’t supposed to be educated. Everything that a true street n*gga isn’t supposed to be, that’s what I want to be”

the most ignorant leprechaun of 09

As im eating my delicious spaghetti my mommy made just for me! :) my sissy beth is like OMG OH NO look at this! im like what!? what!?. She said look at what Plies said in the VIBE magazine. Ok so i already know Plies is pretty like whatev & im not very fond of him anyway but when i read this i was SHOCKED. i honestly didnt think he was this IGNORANT! here's the quote:
" A true street ni**a, he aint supposed to be a responsible father-
the streets is all he"s supposed to be focused on"

WOW..smh. im disgusted & disapointed.

Shoes, Shorties, Subways & Scavengers!

So yes i know. im pretty late with the post about my trip to New York for New Years & what not but i cant even front i was being LAZY! lol
& im still lowkey am.
so here's a little synopis of some of the debauchery:
1st day: we get to JFK @ like 6 ish & then waited for our luggage & then realized we were in front of the wrong carousel. We finaly get the luggage & then hop on to a shuttle bus to take us to LaGuardia (sp) airport to pick up the homies Esther aka Cornbread aka Ese Mae. Mind you while we're waiting for the shuttle the lady who sold us the tickets is tryna to get us to give her a tip. K dont get me twisted with being cheap or anything becuase i always tip people very generously when they do me a service but she didnt do shit but sale me a damn ticket for the bus shuttle. like wtf yo! i dont have time. lol but anywho back to the story.
We get to the other aiport and wait for esther then she arrives and i tried to play a joke on her like the lame but still cool person i am but it didnt work. then we had to wait for her bags then we realize we dont see her after all the luggage is loaded. i started to crack up at first cause i was saying she was going to be freezing and stark nakey in New York. hahahaha that still makes me laugh. SO eventualy we get her bags. So we call the hotel and Beth is like "uum where do we cathc the shuttle to go to the hotel" and the answer we recieved let me lnew how this trip was going to be." HILARIOUS". the lady told beth the shuttle stops running at nine. & beth was like nuh uh. u shoulda said that earlier when i called earlier and asked about the shuttle. & then out of nowhere the lady starts to yell Q48! 3 miles Q 48 3 miles sidenote i am not racist but the lady was japanese so her accent made it funnier.
Eventually we figure out what she's trying to tell us and go outside in the FREEZING cold and wait for a bus. then when we're about to get on the bus the man is like NO! u cant pay with dollar bills only change, Im lookin like wtf! & started to laugh but then i got pissed cuz i thought that was BS. so we went to get change for the bus 2$ in quarters is how much u need ppl whenever u go to New York. SO after cleaning out all the change from the lame? smallest starbucks in the world . the dudes were hella cool and cuties i might add. we get on the bus & realize the lady is a damn LIAR! our hotel was farther than 3 miles! so we get to the hotel and realize we're the ONLY black people there besides these 2 other black girls that bethany discovered like 2 days later @ breakfast while fending off the SCAVENGERS!! hahahaaha but thats a whole different story. that"ll be an entry for tomorrow. so we settle into our room & ordered pizza because we were STARVING! like i all we had all day was some friggin pretzels on the plane lol. so we eat the pizza, shower then pass out.
p.s while i was writing i was listening to Dom Kennedy's mixtape that i got for free from the DOPE concert & it reminded me that i saw this police officer in the subway who looked liked his twin ..true life. he even sounded like him . i was lowkey weided out @ 1st but then estatic becuase i have super tiny crush on Dom Kennedy. hahahaha. but yeas im becomin lazy as we speak lol more tomorrow.